The Happiness Choice

I woke up this morning on the proverbial "wrong side of the bed."  I knew the minute my feet hit the floor that something was off and I needed to course correct if I wanted to make the best out of the day ahead of me.  I also knew that I was meeting up with Mel, my study partner, today and that showing up to our meeting with a scowl on my face would shatter her image of me as a paragon of self actualization. At that moment I had a decision to make. 

Happiness is a choice every moment of the day.  Do I give up my happiness to fear, anger, sadness and frustration OR do I choose to be happy in spite of what I can't control and what is not meeting my expectation/s? 

There is a Jewish story about The Maggid of Mezritch.  His students questioned him as to how it was possible to be happy in life for both the good and the seemingly bad? He told them that they would find out the answer to their question if they went to visit Reb. Zusha. They travelled to his home and found him dressed in worn and torn clothes sitting in a dilapidated house. They asked him their question and he replied puzzled, "I really don't know why he sent you to me.  You should find someone who's really suffering and ask them that question." To Reb. Zusha everything was good because he made the choice internally to accept it and be happy no matter what the external reality looked like. 

When we let the emotions of our unmet expectations overtake us it doesn't actually serve us in a positive way. It only increases personal suffering and doesn't change the situation.  If you're waiting for this to happen before you're happy or that to change before you're happy or for that purchase before you're happy then you're constantly on the treadmill putting your happiness in the hands of something external to yourself.  It's pretty empowering to shift perspective and realize that the choice is ultimately yours. 

I did end up meeting with Mel today and she shared with me some of the challenges she has been going through.  I told her that perfect is never gonna happen and we have to get complete with life how it comes.  She told me that she sees how I choose to be happy despite the circumstances and challenges of my life.  Little did she know that some days it's harder to make that choice than others.