Sweet Surrender

Growing up I always had this vision in my mind of how I wanted things to be. I was going to get married to guy "X" by 29, have my first kid by the age of 30 and have written my first book by the age of 35.  Did any of those things happen? NO! None of those things happened.  In fact if you would have told me that this was the way my life was going to unfold I would have laughed in your face followed by a big, "Yah, right!"  That's the thing about being the oldest child with the "overachiever" mentality...you believe that if you push hard enough and keep yourself focused you can achieve anything. Life doesn't always turn out the way we envision it and the struggle becomes, "What's next?" For me the answer was accepting what's in front of me and appreciating it while simultaneously letting go and opening myself up to what lies ahead down the road and around the corner. Piece of cake right? 

I read a story once about a little girl who had hoped for a party at home with friends for her birthday.  She had not been privy to any plans but she felt fairly certain her parents would surprise her. The day came and the hours passed and still no friends and still no party.  She observed her parents with expectant longing waiting for them to surprise her but it never happened.  Resigned to the reality of the situation she locked herself in her room and refused to come out despite her parents exhortations.  What she didn't realize however was that her parents were on the other side of the door holding birthday balloons and waiting to drive her to a surprise party where her friends were waiting for her at her favorite restaurant. 

When we get "locked up" on the one way we're convinced something has to happen we cut ourselves off from other options we might not have even realized were possible.  Although we may have a certain way we envision our lives unfolding, G-d has ENDLESS ways to send gifts and blessings into our lives.  He is able to give things to us and bring us to places in ways we didn't even know were possible. When you come out of your vision and let go of holding on so tight to the one way you imagined something happening you open yourself up to other possibilities.  It might not happen on your time table and it might not happen the way you thought it would but there is a good chance it will happen and it will be beyond anything you could have conceived.  Are there still things I'm waiting for? YES.  But I've learned to be more flexible about how these things could come to me.  For now I've learned to sit back, relax and enjoy the adventure along the way.  Give it a try.  All you have to do is take the first step: open up the door and let go.  You have no idea what surprises could be waiting for you on the other side.